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Author
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Topic: Fishing Spot
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 04, 2006 08:03 PM
Fishing Spot
My neighbors moved out in 1987 which was good for two reasons: I got rid of noisy, nosey, ne’er-do-wells and picked up their 40-gallon aquarium for a steal. Eager to have some sort of pet (the landlord forbade dogs), I stocked the tank with plants and a half-dozen small largemouth bass pilfered from a local pond. It looked good.
The following day it was time to feed my new pets so I stocked the tank with freshly caught bluegills. Bad idea. The little bug-munchers were viciously territorial and routinely leapt from tank to living room carpet as they fought over limited real estate. The expired wannabe aviators were summarily discovered days later by my following a stench, or ant trail, whichever appeared first.
In time the bass policed the situation, wiping out the bluegill population in the name of consumable protein. However, I was faced with another problem: What to feed the largemouth? This problem was short lived as I quickly found bass will eat almost anything (bugs, lizards, frogs, hamburger, Oreos) except lettuce and breath mints.
After several months I was down to one nice specimen bucket mouth (go figure) whose diet I supplemented with a few weekly bluegills. Still pining for a dog, I affectionately named my finned eating machine “Spot.” I kept Spot almost two years at which time he had simply outgrown his confines, and I decided it was time.
Evicting Spot was quite a chore as the aquarium proved large enough for an inspired largemouth to conduct repeated escape maneuvers. So doing what must be done, I grabbed a gimme-cap, a lawn chair, a cold beverage, an over-priced fishing rod, and your run-of-the-mill crappie jig. I dropped line into the dog pen.
“Fish on!” occurred at T-plus .00035 seconds and the battle ensued. Spot swam one way, the other way, and then yet another. The rod arched and line screamed from the reel as Spot executed dramatic three to four-foot runs. I darned near spilled my cold beverage adjusting the drag.
Masterfully, I played Spot until the idiot box caught my eye and we both took a breather. Once convinced Ewell Gibbons would eat a garage door and the Maytag Repair Man totally lacked ambition, I got back to business with a firm yank on the rod.
To my surprise, the crappie jig (apparently incapable of holding Spot’s interest) shot from the tank and wrapped itself around the living room ceiling fan, which whirled furiously overhead. In less time than it took to hook Spot, the rod flew from my hands, orbited the room twice, knocked half the lame knick-knacks off my fireplace mantle and lodged against the fan motor’s housing with a resounding “SNAP!”
The once-proud living room ceiling fan ground to a halt with a labored whine. I stood dumbfounded while Spot gazed apathetically through the glass. Totally miffed, I switched off the fan, grabbed a garden hose, siphoned the tank, and nabbed Spot.
I lugged the aquarium outside, dumped its contents, gave it a good washing and set it on the front curb. Within the hour I witnessed neighbor kids dragging it toward same house I had gotten it from two years before.
That evening I finished off Spot with instant potatoes, frozen peas, and canned spinach.
We really weren't that close.
Tripp Holmgrain is an avid outdoorsman who now owns a dog. Email him at tripp@theoutdoortripp.com.
This story sound familiar to anyone? ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Buffalobob
Knows what it's all about
Member # 825
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posted June 06, 2006 05:37 PM
Go chase the bear off
Some years back, my wife and two young children and I were camping up in Pennsylvania at a state park campground. As usual we had a plastic trash bag and being as there was no place to hang the trash bag we just left it laying on the ground. After dinner and several rounds of s’mores we all crawled in the tent for the night. About midnight I am awakened by my wife’s elbow in my ribs. She says ‘there’s a bear in the garbage”. I grunt back “OK” and roll back over to go back to sleep. She jabs me again and says “Go chase it off”. I mutter under my breathe something about it being her bear and why doesn’t she go and chase it off.
Well I had no gun nor no knife nor anything but I pulled on my pants and crawled out of the tent with my flashlight. Shining the light all around I see nothing so I try to get back in the tent but my wife says “ Did you hang the garbage bag up so he won’t come back” I say “ummmph” and back out of the tent and go over and grab the garbage bag to take it and hang it up. Well, the bag just goes crazy jumping around in my hand and it is plain that something is in the bag, so I swing it around my head a couple of time and fling it way up into the woods. It bounces a couple of times and comes to a stop and just shakes and quivers and then out comes a skunk who looks around and waddles off.
Posts: 90 | From: Potomac River | Registered: Mar 2006
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Tim Behle
Administrator MacNeal Sector
Member # 209
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posted June 06, 2006 09:36 PM
I bet if you had tossed that bag into the tent, she would have never sent you out after a bear in the middle of the night again.
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Personally, I carry a gun because I'm too young to die and too old to take
an ass kickin'.
Posts: 3160 | From: Five Miles East of Vic, AZ | Registered: Jun 2003
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 06, 2006 10:05 PM
Or done anything else to him in the middle of the night again.
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Leonard
HMFIC
Member # 2
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posted June 07, 2006 12:22 AM
I remember some persistant raccoons on a deer hunt up north. We didn't want to break camp, so we had to leave about 4 something every morning and got back after dark every night. Dinner and in bed by ten or so? At lights out, here came the coons. At first we hung the garbage bags in the crotch of trees, but with aluminum cans and glass clanking and rolling all over the campsite, we started pulling down skinny branches, first, right over the tent. That wasn't such a good idea, because they slid down to the end and squabbled and dropped stuff on us. It was so damned cold that nobody wanted to get out of the sleeping bag and shoo them away. The next night we walked the bags away from the campground, but we still heard them clanking around and it made it harder to pick up after them. Eventually we gave up and put all our crap in the truck and hauled it back and forth every day. That next night, when we got back, the roof of the tent was collapsed like someone had walked on it; maybe wind? After that, it leaked, of course. Kinda funny, now, especially because the first night, it snowed so hard we slept three guys in the cab of the truck, the back was so packed, there wasn't room for anybody. Actually, I know that I didn't sleep at all.
The deer had all migrated into Nevada with the storm, we got one, between us. But, I remember that trip fondly. That's the time where we met two women walking down the mountain with suitcases.
Well, that's another story.
Good hunting. LB
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EL BEE Knows It All and Done It All.
Don't piss me off!
Posts: 31462 | From: Upland, CA | Registered: Jan 2003
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Raven
Knows what it's all about
Member # 204
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posted June 07, 2006 12:39 AM
OMG! Tripp I have never laughed so hard in my life!!
Reminds me of the time we had a mice problem at our house. Mind you, Mom and I kept a clean house! But when you have a place in the middle of a big open field with no other houses around it, You're gonna get field mice from time to time. It's just a fact of nature!
So any way.. I was about 15 or 16 at the time. We would be sitting there eating diner or something and see these furry little Fk'ers running from one side of the room to the other!
So we decided that it was time to get some glue traps, cause they were getting a little to braizen for our tastes, and the dog wasn't doing anything about them! So we set up these damn traps everywhere! I think, we caught one! Then the other mice figured out that those little sticky things were bad and avoided them like the cats to a bath! They would run around them, jump over them.. what ever it took!
One night I'm sitting on the couch watching a movie and I see one climb the curtain across the room from me!!! I mean we're talking floor length curtains! EEEWWWW!!! Ok that was enough for me! All I could picture was one climbing into bed with me! YUCK! I'm looking around for some to throw at him when I realize that my BB gun is sitting in the corner behind me! OH! IT'S ON!
I had this cute little pump action BB/Pellet gun, my grandfather even got a Tasco scope fitted for it! So I carefully pumped it and sit and wait for my kill to come into view. Well that little mouse came down from the drapes and heads towards the kitchen, pausing just at the end of the wall.... I pull up and aim. POP! And another one bites the dust! One Shot, One kill! LOL He dropped where he sat!
Ofcrouse, I felt guilty afterwards cause they really are cute little things when they aren't terrorizing your house! But the next morning I was sure to tell my mom all about my head shot on the little ol' mouse! Mom and I spent the next several months eliminating those little sh*ts in that same fashion! Who knew indoor hunting could be so much fun?? Now If I could just go Coyote hunting without having to leave the couch I'd be set! LOL
Funny thing is, we've never had a mouse problem since like we did that year.... Wonder if the word got out to all the other mice?
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A steak is a terrible thing to waste!
Posts: 38 | From: Killeen TX | Registered: Jun 2003
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Locohead
World Famous Smoke Dancer
Member # 15
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posted June 07, 2006 10:29 AM
Hunting mice with a BB gun!!! Been there done that - one heck of a lot of fun!!!!!!
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I love my critters and chick!!!! :)
Posts: 2219 | From: CO | Registered: Jan 2003
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Cdog911
"There are some ideas so absurd only an intellectual could believe them."--George Orwell.
Member # 7
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posted June 07, 2006 03:03 PM
Good friend of mine, 'bout a year outta high school, was living in a mobile home and he had a bit of a mouse infestation problem. Being a trapper from way back, he set out to fix his problem and was totally unsuccessful in every way. Several weeks into things, he was starting to get frustrated at the mere thought of being bested by a couple little mice. One night, after downing a few cold adult beverages, one of his co-tenants ran past him and down the hallway. Not being what one would call "totally in possession of all his wits", Charlie grabbed the first and closest tool for the job. Turned out to be a 12 gauge. Honest to God, mouse took off down the hallway headed for that little gap under the doors in all mobile homes and Charlie shot. Blew the whole bottom half of the door out, making a great big hole for that mouse to run through. he was evicted the next day, so it's unknown if the problem ever really got fixed.
Coons? Gotta love those coons. The wife and I were up in NW Colorado with her brother and his wife at a place called Fraser Lake. We took a romantic hand-in-hand around the "lake" (what we would call a nice farm pond) and I quickly noticed the abundant red and white signs warning of bears.
That evening, Lisa and I retired to our little green tent with our son, then about 5 years old, between us. Dal and I had turned in early while Lis sat up and talked. I didn't hear her come to bed and was well into a graphic and vivid dream involving bears when all of a sudden, there's this hellacious commotion outside the tent. All kinds of growling and carrying on, and my first thought as I am rudely awakened in that there are bears fighting right outside that thin veil of nylon. This false impression is reinforced somewhat by my (raised in Colorado, used to camping in the mountains) wife's blood curdling screams of "Bear!!!"
Heroically, I push my son toward her, grab my maglight and turn it on and Lisa starts screaming and pointing toward the fly of the tent where a small furry racoon's leg has poked in and has Lisa's purse by the strap, trying to pull it out of the too small opening.
Now, my brother and his wife are high-brow churchy types that go to services four nights a week, never swear, and think everything is an act of God. What happened next has forever changed our relationship with them.
With my maglight in hand, I began an assault using the light as a club and an impressive string of swear words that, to this day, have made their children look at me with suspicion. It was me versus twelve hungry coons. My brother and law and his wife won't hardly talk to me anymore - they say they don't agree with my "lifestyle". That's okay, they are the poster children for those bumper stickers that say, "Jesus loves you - everyone else thinks you're an ******* ".
Despite the mid-night raid, it was kinda funny, looking back.
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I am only one. But still, I am one. I cannot do everything, but still, I can do something; and, because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.
Posts: 5438 | From: The gun-lovin', gun-friendly wild, wild west | Registered: Jan 2003
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 07, 2006 08:39 PM
Anyone think I should turn the mobile home bit into a story?
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 07, 2006 08:40 PM
I'm thinking it stars me and Raven.
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Raven
Knows what it's all about
Member # 204
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posted June 07, 2006 10:11 PM
Oh Dear God! This I gotta hear!
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A steak is a terrible thing to waste!
Posts: 38 | From: Killeen TX | Registered: Jun 2003
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Leonard
HMFIC
Member # 2
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posted June 08, 2006 12:05 AM
Better it be a "reality" series.
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EL BEE Knows It All and Done It All.
Don't piss me off!
Posts: 31462 | From: Upland, CA | Registered: Jan 2003
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Locohead
World Famous Smoke Dancer
Member # 15
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posted June 08, 2006 08:11 AM
Lance, I love your spontaneous use of writing skills here on the board. LOL You tell a great story.
Now let 'er rip Trip. I can't wait for your next one!
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I love my critters and chick!!!! :)
Posts: 2219 | From: CO | Registered: Jan 2003
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 08, 2006 07:06 PM
I've got something important to announce.
There will be no more stories ... no more writing.
It's time to get serious and provide a good life for Raven and the baby.
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Cdog911
"There are some ideas so absurd only an intellectual could believe them."--George Orwell.
Member # 7
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posted June 08, 2006 07:12 PM
As long as you two have known each other and you only have one kid? Sounds like you two need some more "alone time". Drop that young'un off at Leonard's so he can babysit while the two of you go do whatever the two of you do.
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I am only one. But still, I am one. I cannot do everything, but still, I can do something; and, because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.
Posts: 5438 | From: The gun-lovin', gun-friendly wild, wild west | Registered: Jan 2003
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Raven
Knows what it's all about
Member # 204
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posted June 08, 2006 07:21 PM
BABY!!!! ![[Eek!]](eek.gif)
Tell me, How is it that I'm not aware of this baby? I mean Hey I'm all about being taken care of and given the good life, but atleast tell me when I'm pregnant! Mom did you know about this?
Tripp you can still write in your spare time in the dog house. Just think how mayn stories being married will give you! I can see it now....
"Today my wife Raven threw a plate at my head when I came home 6 hours late.... Don't know why she was so mad... "
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A steak is a terrible thing to waste!
Posts: 38 | From: Killeen TX | Registered: Jun 2003
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 08, 2006 07:37 PM
Ahhh....
Married life. I love it already.
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Crow Woman
Knows what it's all about
Member # 157
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posted June 09, 2006 07:49 AM
Baby?? BABY??!!?? Well don't think you are moving back home! I just might go up to the cabin and never come back this time!
I'm more so laughing my butt off at the prospect of Uncle Leonard in Doodle Bugs company together for a few days... hehehe Now wouldn't THAT generate some stories... LOLOL
Raven, you and Tripp have a nice life... just send me pics every now and then, I'll be happy with that!
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
Uncle Leonard and Doodle Bug ![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Cool]](cool.gif)
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Sheri L Baity
Lord, Please give me peace, because if you give me strength, I might beat someone to death!
Posts: 687 | From: Covington | Registered: Mar 2003
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Leonard
HMFIC
Member # 2
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posted June 09, 2006 11:35 AM
Doodle Bug? Sounds like what Larry, (the Cable Guy) would name his son?
But, if I can get him to go to the grocery store for me, it might work out?
And, if it don't work out with Trip; why ruin your whole day? Y'all come west. LB
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EL BEE Knows It All and Done It All.
Don't piss me off!
Posts: 31462 | From: Upland, CA | Registered: Jan 2003
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Raven
Knows what it's all about
Member # 204
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posted June 09, 2006 01:35 PM
Doodle bug, (Aka Jessica) and Uncle Leonared would have lots of fun together I'm sure! She could having him playing with baribie dolls and polly pockets. And ofcrouse watching the disney princess movies! Oh gee, doesn't that sound like fun uncle leonard?
Mom you got room for me up there at your cabin? Tripp's talking about baby's and I'm a little worried... LOL
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A steak is a terrible thing to waste!
Posts: 38 | From: Killeen TX | Registered: Jun 2003
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The Outdoor Tripp
Knows what it's all about
Member # 619
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posted June 09, 2006 07:31 PM
Raven,
Look's like it's smooth sailin' now that Mama and Uncle Leonard have blessed our holy union.
Where do we do our honeymoonin'?
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The Outdoor Tripp
www.theoutdoortripp.com
"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
Posts: 805 | From: Texas | Registered: Mar 2005
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Tim Behle
Administrator MacNeal Sector
Member # 209
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posted June 09, 2006 08:02 PM
Maybe you could Talk Jack into setting you up for a Round-the-World Cruise to celebrate your Out-of-this-world event?
Edit:
And I thought Doodle-bugs were those little black beetles who rolled cow turd balls around the desart?
[ June 09, 2006, 08:07 PM: Message edited by: Tim Behle ]
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Personally, I carry a gun because I'm too young to die and too old to take
an ass kickin'.
Posts: 3160 | From: Five Miles East of Vic, AZ | Registered: Jun 2003
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Raven
Knows what it's all about
Member # 204
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posted June 09, 2006 08:32 PM
Ok I've heard that a Doodle Bug was some kind of Bomb, I heard it's a bug of some sort.... All I know is the little blonde brat that runs around my hosue is doodle bug! LOL
Honeymoon! Now you're speaking my language! How about we just Honeymoon in Italy.. and if we like then we'll stay! LOL
Although I like the round the world cruise idea too! I'll tell you what honey you can pick. That's how nice of a wife I am! LOL
![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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A steak is a terrible thing to waste!
Posts: 38 | From: Killeen TX | Registered: Jun 2003
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Crow Woman
Knows what it's all about
Member # 157
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posted June 09, 2006 10:13 PM
oiy... I need a drink...
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Sheri L Baity
Lord, Please give me peace, because if you give me strength, I might beat someone to death!
Posts: 687 | From: Covington | Registered: Mar 2003
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Jack Roberts
Knows what it's all about
Member # 13
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posted June 09, 2006 10:16 PM
There are lots of "Around the World Cruises" available but they all require 5-7 days on the open ocean every now and then. Can we say "boredom city"? An occasional 2 days at sea gives you a chance to rest up, more than that is "cabin fever" time.
Jack
Posts: 499 | From: Elko NV formerly MD | Registered: Jan 2003
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